Dear Dr. Garner,
Thanks so much for your column and TV show. My whole family enjoys reading and watching.
I have a question to ask. We have a 12-year-old son who seems to have the “blues” day in and day out. He doesn’t play with his friends, and he just seems sad all the time.
When his friends go to the movies, he would rather stay home and stay in his room. If he were an adult, I would think he was depressed. Is it possible for children to suffer from depression?
Sad Son in Ditmas Park
Dear Sad,
I am sorry to hear of your problem. Children can definitely experience depression. Recent studies estimate that about five percent of children in the general population suffer from depression, and one in six may have mental illness.
Depression is often inherited and runs in families. Children may exhibit depression when they are under stress, experience a loss or if they have attention and learning problems. Short bouts of the “blues” are not depression. Depression takes over one’s life and radically changes behavior.
To determine if your child suffers from depression, here are warning signs that parents should look for:
1. Frequent crying or tearfulness
2. Irritability or anger
3. Hopelessness
4. Boredom
5. Being isolated without friends
6. Having low self-esteem
7. Being extremely emotional when rejection or failure occurs
8. Frequent complaints of head-aches and stomachaches
9. Changes in eating or sleeping habits
10. Talk of suicide or feelings of worthlessness
A child who is depressed may have had a large social network and now wants to be alone. Things that were once fun no longer bring joy to the child. The child may start to abuse drugs or alcohol. It is essential to detect these symptoms as early as possible to prevent them from worsening.
The first step is to have the child evaluated by a physician. This can help determine if he does indeed have depression or another mental illness. It is important to examine what is going on in the child’s life, such as divorce, death of a parent or financial difficulties. This can often bring on behavioral problems. Some children get better with time, but others require ongoing counseling and medication.
There are multiple treatments available including various types of medication and counseling. It is important to be in close contact with your child’s teacher to help evaluate his behavior at school.
Children with mental illness need guidance and understanding from their parents, family and caregivers. Proper support from this network of loved ones can help the child alleviate anxiety, even as it puts adults under stress.
There are places to get help, such as community health centers, support groups and mental health specialists. It is estimated that up to one in eight children in their teenage years will experience depression. It is wise for parents and caregivers to learn about depression. Usually it is not caused by just one event but is related to a deficiency or imbalance in nerve chemicals within the brain.
Make an appointment with your family physician and get your child on the path to recovery. Once you have had your son tested, make sure any medications are taken as prescribed. Your child should also stay physically active, which has been shown to alleviate symptoms of depression.
Accept the situation, be supportive and nurture your child. This is not something he can “snap out of” on his own. Be on the lookout for warning symptoms. If your child talks of suicide, address the situation immediately.
Suicide is the second leading cause of death in children, aged 12-17 – second only to accident. With proper intervention, this tragic outcome can be avoided.
Please keep me informed of your son’s progress.[hr] Dr. Steven Garner is a Fidelis Care provider who is affiliated with New York Methodist Hospital, Park Slope. He also hosts “Ask the Doctor” on NET, Tuesdays at 8 p.m. on Ch. 97 Time Warner and Ch. 30 Cablevision.
