Diocesan News

Catholic Couple Has Prayed Together, and Stayed Together, for 43 Years

Our Lady of Guadalupe Church has been a second home to Joe and Janet Bova. (Photo: Paula Katinas)

BENSONHURST — Joe and Janet Bova have been married for 43 years and like most couples who have been together for a long time, they can finish each other’s sentences and can communicate with just a glance.

Their togetherness extends to their service at Our Lady of Guadalupe Church in Bensonhurst, where they have been parishioners for decades — in Joe’s case, nearly his entire life.

On most Sunday mornings, you can find them at 8 a.m. Mass where Joe is an extraordinary minister of holy Communion and Janet serves as a lector. And on the Sundays when they’re not serving, they attend Mass together. 

“Praying together and going to Mass together has been important to us,” said Janet, a retired teacher. Joe, a retired project manager for the New York City School Construction Authority, agreed. “It brings us closer to our faith because we’re one and it makes us whole. It’s very natural for us to pray together,” he explained.

To paraphrase an old adage, the Bovas are proof that the couple that prays together stays together.

And that isn’t just wishful thinking. There’s statistical evidence to back it up.

According to a study by the Harvard University School of Public Health, married couples who regularly attend religious services together are 50% less likely to get divorced. The Harvard researchers followed 66,000 couples over a 14-year period to reach their conclusions.

Here’s more evidence: According to the Institute for Family Studies, couples in which the husband and wife both attend religious services (even if they don’t attend them together) are 9% more likely to report feeling happy in their relationship than couples who are not church-goers.

Msgr. Robert Romano (right), pastor of Our Lady of Guadalupe Church, said Joe and Janet Bova serve the church in a modest way, without seeking to draw attention to themselves. “They don’t try to act like they’re holier than thou,” he added. (Photo: Paula Katinas)

Serving at Mass isn’t the only way the Bovas have contributed to parish life at Our Lady of Guadalupe. For many years, they ran wedding rehearsals at the church and offered sage advice to jittery brides and grooms.

Joe is also past president of the Holy Name Society and Janet helps decorate the church for holidays. Volunteering is a Bova family trait. When their two adult children — son Jonathan and daughter Jessica — were young, they were altar servers.

But Joe and Janet’s service as extraordinary minister of holy Communion and lector is central to their lives. 

Joe has been administering Communion since 1978. “I think I was in the second class the diocese ever had for EMEs,” he said, using the diocese’s initials for the formal title Extraordinary Ministers of the Eucharist. The act of distributing Communion helps him to feel closer to God, he added.

Janet, who has been a lector for more than 40 years, still remembers her first time at the pulpit. “I was a little bit anxious. But once I got up there, I was fine,” she recalled.

Her biggest decision was whether or not to wear her glasses. “I wore glasses for distance and it was a big decision whether I put them on while I read so that I could see the faces of the people in the pews or not wear them and have the people look like a blur. So the first time, I didn’t wear my glasses. But I realized I really need to see people’s faces,” she explained.

Msgr. Robert Romano, the pastor of Our Lady of Guadalupe Church, called the Bovas an important part of parish life. “They’re reliable. They’re there every Sunday and even if they’re not doing their ministries, they’re there. As a priest, to walk out to serve Mass and see them sitting there means a lot,” he said.

Janet grew up in Sunset Park and attended the Basilica of Our Lady of Perpetual Help. Joe, a native of Bensonhurst, has been attending Our Lady of Guadalupe for as long as he can remember.

They met at the wedding of a mutual friend. Janet, who was in the bridal party, was dancing with the groomsman she was partnered with when the man’s wife cut in while Frank Sinatra’s song “Summer Wind” was playing. So Janet danced with Joe. “And that was the start of everything,” he said.

“Summer Wind” is still one of their favorite songs.

The Bovas were married at Our Lady of Perpetual Help because it was Janet’s home parish. But they settled in Bensonhurst after the wedding and have been attending Our Lady of Guadalupe ever since.